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Gracie Fairfax | Echo
Coming into freshman year of college, everyone wants to figure out a way to stand out. Some put on their best outfit, while others hit the books. For junior Natalie Halleen, a back brace fit the bill.
During the summer of 2013, before starting college, Halleen went to the beach with a friend near her home on the south shore of Long Island, New York. A massive storm had hit the night before, which had stirred up the water on a beach already known for its large waves.
They body-surfed in the ocean, and as she began treading backwards in the water to catch a wave, she jumped too late and watched the wave crash on top of her, picking her up and tossing her around.
"I fell immediately on top of my back, smashed down and my legs swung up and hit me in the face," Halleen said. "I felt a big crack and the first thing I did was kick my feet to make sure they were still working."
At first Halleen thought she wouldn't be able to get back up and would die on the spot. It was the closest thing she's ever faced to a near-death experience.
Amidst the confusion and ceaseless waves, she mustered up the energy to run from the water and over to the lifeguard stand for help.
Despite the trauma in the moment, Halleen was quickly able to see the brighter side of the situation.
"I got to ride (in) an ambulance-that was my dream," Halleen said. "I didn't want to be dying to be in an ambulance and that worked out perfectly, because I just had a broken back."
Halleen continued to laugh as she recounted her 11 hours in the ER, many of which were spent watching Seinfeld.
Initially, the doctors assured her nothing was wrong, but after the MRI came back, the doctors found 12 compression fractures in five vertebrae. The next morning she was given her back brace, which she jokingly referred to as "custom-made."
Her sense of humor being one of the few things still intact, she took the opportunity to use her mom's phone to scare her brother. "Natalie broke her back. We're at the hospital," she texted.
Since her accident happened in July, she had a full month to adjust to her brace before entering the collegiate sphere. She realized her brace drew apprehensive stares, but she looked forward to the times it served as a conversation starter.
"As soon as I said, 'Oh it's a temporary thing,' they opened up to ask so many more questions," Halleen said. "I pretty much was always the one who started the conversations about it because I'd make a joke about it."
From the start of her Taylor experience, her back brace took center stage, as she struggled to participate in Welcome Weekend festivities.
She remembers playing a game that required her team to run across the field.
"I just had to do this awkward robot shuffle. Everyone would look at me weird," Halleen said.
Over time, she became known as "Back Brace Girl" to strangers around campus.
While the experience did provide her with some comic relief at times, it also provided her with a new perspective and the ability to choose how she was going to let it affect her.
The first day she got home from the hospital, she wrote "embrace the day" on her mirror and underlined brace. She then asked herself how she would be able to use each day to her advantage.
One of Halleen's friends, junior Taylor Stevens, admired the way Halleen presented herself while in her brace.
"I think Natalie handled coming to Taylor with a back brace better than anyone else would've," Stevens said. "She was strong, graceful and beautiful while rocking Bernardo, the name we gave the brace. I wanted to be her friend so badly, and now I am. It's wonderful."
Halleen also remembers a dad encouraging her during a Habecker breakfast she attended with her parents. He told her how much he admired her outlook on the situation.
"He said he looked up to me in a way, and I had never had anything like that said to me before," Halleen said.
Her family also played an important role in lifting her spirits on days that were difficult.
Before Halleen came to Taylor, her brother, who was gone at the time of the accident, visited her in Long Island. She recalls driving with him and talking about how she felt about the extra attention.
Again, Halleen took the opportunity to see the positives, as she explained why she was looking forward to the attention.
"I made this weird analogy about zebras. I was like, 'You go into college and there's so many people and all the girls are zebras," Halleen said. "They're all beautiful zebras, but when you see them all together in a big pack of zebras, they all blend together . . . but if one of those zebras had a back brace on, you would notice it."
She says the joke lifted her spirits with comic relief. When she felt a bit discouraged, her brother sent her a picture of a zebra in the middle of a pack of zebras wearing a back brace to encourage her to persevere.
She took the brace off over Fall Break, and when she returned to school, she realized that people didn't recognize her. Later on, she was talking to a group of people when she brought up that she was "Back Brace Girl."
"Everyone was in agreement that they all thought I transferred," Halleen said. "They remembered the brace, not the face. That's what I always said."
Although the brace became her identity to many, Halleen values the growth she experienced throughout her recovery.
"I learned how to cope with a difficult situation. There are definitely more difficult situations that people have to go through, but this one was mine," Halleen said. "Having that constant thankfulness I think I can use for future difficulties. There's absolutely a plan for why it happened, and God is going to use it in some way."
Some hide their pain, while others have pain that is impossible to hide. Because Halleen's was so visible, it became all about learning to have the best reaction she could-complete with thankfulness, a good joke and the occasional zebra analogy.
